The age-old question that every divorce lawyer encounters again and again is, “Am I ready to get a divorce?” Considering that a divorce implies a radical and permanent change to one’s life, it’s understandable that people deliberate over the choice to end their marriage.
In fact, it can be downright confusing and terrifying to make a decision like this. However, with the right mindset and by considering the right topics, you will know when you’re ready. With this in mind, you may want to consider the following two things.
1. Do you feel indifferent about your marriage?
One thing that impedes marriage and couples counseling is the feeling of indifference about the relationship. If you just can’t find the motivation to care, be interested or even have sympathy for your spouse and his or her feelings, then it’s a good sign you’re ready to break up your marriage.
This feeling of indifference is almost a feeling of numbness and it usually comes about after many painful fights that never got resolved. Eventually, you just get numb and you stop feeling.
2. Are you able to be honest with yourself and your role in the breakdown of your marriage?
Individuals who can be honest with themselves — and see the role that they have also played in the breakdown of their marriages — are probably more ready than others to divorce in a healthy way. However, if you’re still unable to self-reflect — and you can’t gain objective insight into how the breakdown of your marriage is not just the fault of your spouse — you might want to wait a little longer before you begin your divorce. Through therapy, you can come to terms with honest reflections about your relationship and there will be a better chance that you can dissolve your marriage peacefully.
Are you ready to divorce?
Ultimately, spouses know when the time is right for divorce. In some cases, the decision comes quickly in a flash of knowing, and in other cases, the decision comes to the surface slowly. Either way, it’s best to strive to divorce peacefully as possible in an out-of-court divorce settlement.